“Honey, will you just move!!” Three horrified ladies glanced at my children, and scowled at my outburst. Then and there I hung my head in shame. In front of my kids, and these watching ladies, I had blown it.
I could spend the entire day listing my failures, and still run out of time. I fail often. Often, I fail big. I’ve blown it as a Christian, a wife, a parent, friend, and every other relationship possible at least once in my life. The question isn’t will I blow it, but a matter of when.
In the ugliness that is my sin, the beauty is God’s response to my failures. It is not because of my goodness I am forgiven, but because of Christ’s.
When I blow it, my children are watching. So is the world. What do they see? Prayerfully, they are seeing a lady whose heart is broken over her failure; a woman humbly coming before God to confess her sin, asking for His mercy and grace. Hopefully, they see a woman who struggles to no longer live in her sin, but live everyday bringing glory to God.
Yes, we blow it. Constantly. Our response to our failure is a lesson for our children. Through our example, they learn the importance of Christ’s gift of forgiveness. They understand what it means to have a repentant heart. And, they are taught to draw close to God.
In my weakness, God is gracious. He uses my messes and missteps to prove He can use anyone. I am not perfect, but my God is.
“What then? Shall we sin because we are not under law but under grace? May it never be!”
~ Romans 6:15
Chime In!: How do you reestablish trust after you’ve blown it with your kids?
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A Homeschool Mom 
I think the best thing we can do is tell them why we were wrong and apologize. We’ve all been there way more times than we care to admit.
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Teaching our children the art of a good apology is a priceless gift and we wouldn’t be able to give that if it weren’t for our own moments of insanity, lol…
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A wonderful thing about having several kids is that you get to teach this lesson over and over again. Each lesson being taught at different maturity levels. My sons typically reprimand me when they witness my short comings. I am sure you heard the “mom, that wasn’t very nice” or “you should apologize”. I glad they say these things because I know that are repeating what I tell them. To me it means they “get it”.
And they are always watching us aren’t they.
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Absolutely!
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Yes!
It IS our response to our failures that becomes the most important piece of our parenting. Because, like you said, it’s not a matter of will I fail, but when I will fail:-/
I apologize to my kids. Openly and sincerely. I honor the pain I may have caused by my mistake, and ask for their forgiveness. I explain that it’s not their fault– it’s mine. But human beings aren’t perfect… And neither is their mother!
I hope that, in valuing my relationship with them over my own ego needs to retain my image of perfection, I am modeling how to be a loving, yet vastly imperfect human being. Being able to apologize and take responsibility for our own mistakes is a very valuable skill. Reconciliation and repentance are important aspects of our own relationship with God.
Sometimes the best way to be a good mom, is to just be a humble human being;)
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Exactly!
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I appreciate the vulnerability in sharing this and I love the conclusion. Particularly the phrase: ”Our response to our failure is a lesson for our children.”
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Thank you.
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I think confessing our faults to our children (when it involves them) and asking their forgiveness is one of the best examples we can set. It teaches them that they don’t have to be perfect, but they do have to deal with their mistakes with humility and love.
Your children are blessed to have a mother who strives to pattern her life after Christ’s example. For all too many children, a sentence like “Honey, will you just move!!” is one of the nicest things their parents/guardians say to them all day.
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You are very kind.
Our prayers go out to those parents battling anger and frustration. May the Lord help them see the beauty that is parenting.
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Thank God for prayer and forgiveness!
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Amen!
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I try to be completely honest with my children about what I did, why I did it and why I’m working hard to not do it again. They tend to be very forgiving and move right along as if nothing happened. But I’ve always made it a point to talk to them honestly and apologize when I’m out of line.
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